STASI: Trump’s W.H. is real s–thole after racist remarks
What a s#!thole the White House has become with a f#!%ing moron in charge.
What? You think the language is rough and disrespectful? Then don’t complain to me, send your complaints directly to your President and tell him to stop using that kind of language about other countries (and maybe drop a note to Rex Tillerson about using that kind of language about Trump).
That’s the level of low that the porn star-loving, p—y-grabbing, white supremacist-defending, climate change-denying, truth-averting, freedom of the press-despising, global warming-loving, free speech-hating, conspiracy-believing, history-twisting, strongman-admiring, race-baiting combover king has brought the U.S. to in one short year.
We’re in some deep s#!t when even the UN denounces our President for making racist “shithole” comments about Africa, Haiti and their immigrants (who are mostly people of color) while asking why we don’t have more immigrants from Norway, which is so white you could go snow-blind just from staring too long at the people. And oh, by the way, since Norway for the past 13 years has been designated by the UN as the best country in which to live and the U.S. the 11th, Norwegians probably won’t start breaking down our borders to get here. They even rank Iceland as a better place to live than the U.S. Of course, they have Björk, but still …
Front page of the New York Daily News for Friday, Jan. 12, 2018.
(New York Daily News/New York Daily News)
Wasn’t this Hitler’s dream too? A country with a master race of white people? Good thing Trump’s beloved daughter Ivanka has converted to Judaism, or he might be after them instead of sending his dopey son-in-law to negotiate Middle East peace because he’s the Jew in the family. If only his sons would have married Africans, instead of just thinking it’s a place to slaughter endangered species on rich-boy Safari, Trump might like Africans, too.
Tragic truth: In one year Donald J. Trump alone has turned the White House into a sinkhole of ignorance, bigotry and hatred against anyone who isn’t a white man in a suit. True, he used to welcome Steve Bannon, who showed up looking like an out-of-work gym teacher, but that’s because he thought Bannon had his back. Ooops.
OK, I’m not being fair. The Donald does allow people of color to show up on occasion, and he did appoint brain surgeon Ben Carson as HUD secretary even though his qualifications for housing secretary are that he lives in a house.
But yes, on the anniversary of one of the greatest natural disasters in modern times, the Haitian earthquake that killed 230,000 human beings, our President denounced Haiti. Then he invited several token African-Americans to watch him sign a proclamation and to celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s life after denouncing the continent from which their ancestors came.
They probably shouldn’t have even shown up, but while they were there I wish they would have taken a knee in protest. In fact, on Monday, MLK Day, we all should protest the racist comments of our President by taking a knee whenever he shows up on TV.
DON TALK NOT FIT FOR KING
Not everyone believes that our President is not only off-track but has gone off the rails completely. To get a view from the other side of the train, I turned to my favorite Republican, Congressman Pete King.
“Tell me, Congressman, do you think President Trump is sane?” I asked.
“I think he’s sane,” he answered. “He’s iconoclastic. But by not having the discipline to say or not say what’s appropriate, he creates problems. He makes these tough-guy remarks, and you can’t do that as President. It’s 1960s bar humor.
“But the people who came here through TPS came here legally. I think I have the first- or second-highest number of Salvadorans in my district who came here under TPS. There is absolutely no issue — they have mortgages, their kids go to school, they work hard, pay taxes and are a very vibrant, active part of this community.
“Priests have told me that Catholic parishes on Long Island have been kept going strong by the Haitian (immigrants).”
But does the President appreciate this?
“I’ve been in a number of meetings with him and he’ll suddenly start talking about DACA and how were have to take care of these immigrants’ kids,” King said.
Then why does he project a different image to the public?
“I can’t explain it,” the congressman said. “When I hear him say this stuff I feel like I’m back in a bar in the 1960s. I can imagine him sitting in a bar in Queens back then.”
The problem is that Archie Bunker with the bar humor has become the President.
Adult film actress Stormy Daniels said she did not take $130,000 in exchange for remaining mum about the sexual tryst she had with Donald Trump over a decade ago.
(Ethan Miller/Getty Images)
Front page of the New York Daily News for Jan. 13, 2018.
(New York Daily News)
It’s hard to keep a porn star down. Literally.
After a report came out that horny porny star Stormy Daniels took $130,000 shortly before the 2016 election in exchange for shutting her trap about an alleged sexual tryst she had with Donald Trump over a decade ago, another porn star popped up on Friday.
Porn actress Alana Evans told the Daily Beast that just one day after the alleged Stormy tryst, Trump chased her around a hotel room “in his tighty-whities.” Oh God. Make it go away.
And please, call your local suicide hotline immediately if you experience the inability to unsee that image and have lost the will to live.
HELP WANTED ON UFOS
The secret airline of Area 51, which sort of doesn’t exist at a U.S. military base and supposedly housing crashed alien aircraft that sort of don’t exist with dead aliens, is looking for flight attendants for Janet Airlines, an airline that also sort of doesn’t exist.
According to several news sites, including Newser, the “Air Force-owned planes operated by defense contractor AECOM,” which ferry government employees and contractors from Las Vegas to Area 51, is advertising for flight attendants. Applicants “must be level-headed and clear thinking while handling unusual incidents and situations…” The unusual incidents don’t include dealing with gray aliens who refuse to return their seat backs to the full and upright positions).
The secret Las Vegas airline is looking for flight attendants to take trips to Area 51.
UFO expert and best-selling author Whitley Strieber (“Afterlife Revolution” and “Communion”), who knows more aliens from outer space than Trump wants to deport from Earth, said, “It cannot be to fly personnel who have always worked there. Something different must be happening.”
SOMETHING JUST DOESN’T SMELL RIGHT
One of the President’s favorite white guys — and there are a lot of them — is stinking up the joint with his tremendous B.O.
WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, who is enjoying a five-year standoff at the Knightsbridge embassy in Ecuador, has such horrible personal hygiene (or make that no personal hygiene) that the embassy staffers are creating a big stink over his bad smell.
Embassy staffers at the Knightsbridge embassy in Ecuador are saying WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange (pictured) has no personal hygiene.
(JUSTIN TALLIS/AFP/Getty Images)
You’d think that a guy who sleeps in the embassy’s former women’s bathroom would at least have learned how to use the indoor plumbing.